Narcissistic behavior is categorized by having an “exaggerated sense of self-importance” or an unearned admiration for themselves, going beyond what someone might expect in a healthy amount of confidence. When around a narcissist, you will likely notice that your own needs and expectations are constantly overshadowed or ignored. You might even have trouble getting a word in during conversations because the narcissist is too focused on what they want to say, even when no one else is listening.
If your spouse fits the description of being a narcissist, then they might very well be one. In that case, you already know that it can be difficult to maintain a healthy marriage with a narcissist. Throughout your marriage, you will probably feel like you are being kept in “second place,” which is not easy to work through day after day. Even with your best efforts to keep your relationship intact, you should not feel like you have failed if you have found that your marriage is becoming unfulfilling because your narcissistic spouse is hogging all the attention.
Divorcing a Narcissist
Of course, you do not need to stay in an unfulfilling marriage with a narcissist if you think leaving would be for the best. Every state allows for a divorce filing based on irreconcilable differences, which means you do not need to go into any details for your divorce to be legally valid. But you should also be prepared for the high chance that divorcing your narcissistic spouse will probably be even more problematic than your marriage with them.
A narcissist in divorce will believe that they are entitled to much more than their spouse. From property division to child custody, a narcissist will most likely want more than their fair or equitable share. Even when it should be clear that they are demanding too much – like ownership of separate property that rightfully belongs to you – they might be adamant in saying that they aren’t. Your divorce with a narcissist will probably end up contested.
Getting Through a Contested Divorce
A divorce is contested when the divorcing spouses cannot agree upon one or more matters to the point that mediation fails, and courtroom litigation becomes a necessity. No one really wants to be in a contested divorce, but it happens often, especially for people who are divorcing narcissists.
To begin your contested divorce, it is important to remember your rights and that you are important. Do not give more power to your narcissistic spouse by diminishing your worth for them. A relationship with a narcissist can damage your self-image and make you forget who you are, so you might even want to work with a therapist if you are feeling out of touch with your thoughts and emotions.
Next, you should plan on working with a divorce attorney if you haven’t already. A family lawyer can guide you through even the most difficult of divorces with a narcissist. If your divorce is headed for court, then you will already be ready for the worst your narcissistic soon-to-be ex-spouse can throw at you by leaving litigation planning and representation up to your attorney.
If you’re planning for a tough divorce with a narcissistic spouse in Orange County, then go ahead and dial (949) 681-9952 to connect with Gill Law Group, PC. Our divorce lawyers are standing by to advance your divorce case while continually protecting your best interests and rights. Get your complimentary case evaluation today to begin.